Изя шутит. Анекдоты, шутки, афоризмы.

{"document": [{"text": [{"type": "string", "attributes": {}, "string": "***"}], "attributes": ["heading1"]}, {"text": [{"type": "string", "attributes": {}, "string": "- А ты знаешь, что недосып плохо влияет на фигуру?"}], "attributes": []}, {"text": [{"type": "string", "attributes": {}, "string": "- Ой, а я, дурочка, на тортик грешила!"}], "attributes": []}, {"text": [{"type": "attachment", "attributes": {"presentation": "gallery"}, "attachment": {"caption": "", "contentType": "image/jpeg", "filename": "InShot_20221201_154009827.jpg", "filesize": 339763, "height": 1920, "pic_id": 285132, "url": "https://storage.yandexcloud.net/pabliko.files/article_cloud_image/2022/12/02/InShot_20221201_154009827.jpeg", "width": 1920}}], "attributes": []}, {"text": [{"type": "string", "attributes": {}, "string": "***"}], "attributes": ["heading1"]}, {"text": [{"type": "string", "attributes": {}, "string": "- Сёма, меня вчера таки хотели изнасиловать, - говорит жена."}], "attributes": []}, {"text": [{"type": "string", "attributes": {}, "string": "- С чего ты взяла?"}], "attributes": []}, {"text": [{"type": "string", "attributes": {}, "string": "- Не хотели бы - не изнасиловали бы."}], "attributes": []}, {"text": [{"type": "attachment", "attributes": {"presentation": "gallery"}, "attachment": {"caption": "", "contentType": "image/jpeg", "filename": "InShot_20221201_153406103.jpg", "filesize": 793581, "height": 3072, "pic_id": 285136, "url": "https://storage.yandexcloud.net/pabliko.files/article_cloud_image/2022/12/02/InShot_20221201_153406103.jpeg", "width": 3072}}], "attributes": []}, {"text": [{"type": "string", "attributes": {}, "string": "***"}], "attributes": ["heading1"]}, {"text": [{"type": "string", "attributes": {}, "string": "- Изя, вы совершенно не попадаете в ноты!"}], "attributes": []}, {"text": [{"type": "string", "attributes": {}, "string": "- Таки я и не целюсь!"}], "attributes": []}, {"text": [{"type": "attachment", "attributes": {"presentation": "gallery"}, "attachment": {"caption": "", "contentType": "image/jpeg", "filename": "InShot_20221201_152923504.jpg", "filesize": 361407, "height": 1920, "pic_id": 285137, "url": "https://storage.yandexcloud.net/pabliko.files/article_cloud_image/2022/12/02/InShot_20221201_152923504.jpeg", "width": 1920}}], "attributes": []}, {"text": [{"type": "string", "attributes": {}, "string": "***"}], "attributes": ["heading1"]}, {"text": [{"type": "string", "attributes": {}, "string": "- Боря, где ты познакомился с этой девушкой?"}], "attributes": []}, {"text": [{"type": "string", "attributes": {}, "string": "- Как где? В парке под фонарем."}], "attributes": []}, {"text": [{"type": "string", "attributes": {}, "string": "- И шо, фонарь тогда не работал?"}], "attributes": []}, {"text": [{"type": "attachment", "attributes": {"presentation": "gallery"}, "attachment": {"caption": "", "contentType": "image/jpeg", "filename": "InShot_20221201_152528483.jpg", "filesize": 425300, "height": 1920, "pic_id": 285139, "url": "https://storage.yandexcloud.net/pabliko.files/article_cloud_image/2022/12/02/InShot_20221201_152528483.jpeg", "width": 1920}}], "attributes": []}, {"text": [{"type": "string", "attributes": {}, "string": "***"}], "attributes": ["heading1"]}, {"text": [{"type": "string", "attributes": {}, "string": "Мужик стучит в дверь, подходит собака и говорит:"}], "attributes": []}, {"text": [{"type": "string", "attributes": {}, "string": "- Дома никого нет!"}], "attributes": []}, {"text": [{"type": "string", "attributes": {}, "string": "- А... а чего ты не лаешь?"}], "attributes": []}, {"text": [{"type": "string", "attributes": {}, "string": "- Пугать тебя не хотела."}], "attributes": []}, {"text": [{"type": "attachment", "attributes": {"presentation": "gallery"}, "attachment": {"caption": "", "contentType": "image/jpeg", "filename": "InShot_20221201_151748314.jpg", "filesize": 449131, "height": 1920, "pic_id": 285142, "url": "https://storage.yandexcloud.net/pabliko.files/article_cloud_image/2022/12/02/InShot_20221201_151748314.jpeg", "width": 1920}}], "attributes": []}, {"text": [{"type": "string", "attributes": {}, "string": "***"}], "attributes": []}, {"text": [{"type": "string", "attributes": {}, "string": "- Фима, ты шо такой довольный?"}], "attributes": []}, {"text": [{"type": "string", "attributes": {}, "string": "- Тёща уехала."}], "attributes": []}, {"text": [{"type": "string", "attributes": {}, "string": "- А почему лицо грязное?"}], "attributes": []}, {"text": [{"type": "string", "attributes": {}, "string": "- Поезд целовал."}], "attributes": []}, {"text": [{"type": "attachment", "attributes": {"presentation": "gallery"}, "attachment": {"caption": "", "contentType": "image/jpeg", "filename": "InShot_20221201_151638808.jpg", "filesize": 296991, "height": 1920, "pic_id": 285144, "url": "https://storage.yandexcloud.net/pabliko.files/article_cloud_image/2022/12/02/InShot_20221201_151638808.jpeg", "width": 1920}}], "attributes": []}, {"text": [{"type": "string", "attributes": {}, "string": "***"}], "attributes": ["heading1"]}, {"text": [{"type": "string", "attributes": {}, "string": "- Сарочка, как приготовить заливного осетра?"}], "attributes": []}, {"text": [{"type": "string", "attributes": {}, "string": "- Очень просто! Берете минтая и заливаете, что это осетр!"}], "attributes": []}, {"text": [{"type": "attachment", "attributes": {"presentation": "gallery"}, "attachment": {"caption": "", "contentType": "image/jpeg", "filename": "InShot_20221201_151229425.jpg", "filesize": 403359, "height": 1920, "pic_id": 285145, "url": "https://storage.yandexcloud.net/pabliko.files/article_cloud_image/2022/12/02/InShot_20221201_151229425.jpeg", "width": 1920}}], "attributes": []}, {"text": [{"type": "string", "attributes": {}, "string": "***"}], "attributes": ["heading1"]}, {"text": [{"type": "string", "attributes": {}, "string": "- Изя, как разделить 4 картошки на 5 человек?"}], "attributes": []}, {"text": [{"type": "string", "attributes": {}, "string": "- Не морочь мне голову, свари таки пюре."}], "attributes": []}, {"text": [{"type": "attachment", "attributes": {"presentation": "gallery"}, "attachment": {"caption": "", "contentType": "image/jpeg", "filename": "InShot_20221201_151046891.jpg", "filesize": 304854, "height": 1920, "pic_id": 285147, "url": "https://storage.yandexcloud.net/pabliko.files/article_cloud_image/2022/12/02/InShot_20221201_151046891.jpeg", "width": 1920}}], "attributes": []}, {"text": [{"type": "string", "attributes": {}, "string": "***"}], "attributes": ["heading1"]}, {"text": [{"type": "string", "attributes": {}, "string": "Роза Моисеевна была совершенно здорова... Но тут доктор узнал, что она жена директора банка..."}], "attributes": []}, {"text": [{"type": "attachment", "attributes": {"presentation": "gallery"}, "attachment": {"caption": "", "contentType": "image/jpeg", "filename": "InShot_20221201_150948108.jpg", "filesize": 356642, "height": 1920, "pic_id": 285148, "url": "https://storage.yandexcloud.net/pabliko.files/article_cloud_image/2022/12/02/InShot_20221201_150948108.jpeg", "width": 1920}}], "attributes": []}, {"text": [{"type": "string", "attributes": {}, "string": "***"}], "attributes": ["heading1"]}, {"text": [{"type": "string", "attributes": {}, "string": "- Ну как там мои дела, доктор?"}], "attributes": []}, {"text": [{"type": "string", "attributes": {}, "string": "- Хм... можете взять кредит?"}], "attributes": []}, {"text": [{"type": "string", "attributes": {}, "string": "- Но мне нечем отдавать!"}], "attributes": []}, {"text": [{"type": "string", "attributes": {}, "string": "- А вам и не придётся."}], "attributes": []}, {"text": [{"type": "attachment", "attributes": {"presentation": "gallery"}, "attachment": {"caption": "", "contentType": "image/jpeg", "filename": "InShot_20221201_145308188.jpg", "filesize": 367351, "height": 1920, "pic_id": 285149, "url": "https://storage.yandexcloud.net/pabliko.files/article_cloud_image/2022/12/02/InShot_20221201_145308188.jpeg", "width": 1920}}], "attributes": []}, {"text": [{"type": "string", "attributes": {}, "string": "Улыбайтесь и подписывайтесь на мой канал."}], "attributes": []}, {"text": [{"type": "string", "attributes": {}, "string": "Еще больше юмора на "}, {"type": "string", "attributes": {"href": "https://dzen.ru/id/5dc88a2768e68b2090786886"}, "string": "https: //dzen. ru/id/5dc88a2768e68b2090786886"}], "attributes": []}], "selectedRange": [1040, 1040]}